Broken

So distressed that nothing anyone can say can make me feel better.  When they try I push them away, making me seem angry, controlling and unreasonable.  I hate myself but I can't stop it because I can't explain why everything is so bad.  Can't seem to do anything right, get shouted at or corrected for everything I do. Sometimes real, sometimes in my head.  Want to run away ....

So shut down I can't even pretend to feel better to make others feel better. I hurt inside so much and I don't know how to fix it.  Trying not to cry, something else I'm failing at.  Just want everything to stop.